Your Humble Correspondent’s increasing inability to process more than one thought and idea at a time leads him back to the most basic of formats for Monday morning Qs at Kenan. As some Italian artist/math guy once mused, “Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication,” we pulled out the very workout used exactly 52 weeks ago—snaking the steps in Kenan Stadium.

That the stadium was all coiffed and buffed with two sections of brand new seats, new turf on the playing field and new Field Turf surrounding it to beckon the opening of Tar Heel football’s preseason camp on Wednesday made it all the more appropriate to send July out within the friendly confines of the 90-year-old arena.

To wit: Using the 12 sections of seats on the north side of the stadium (visitors’ side), 21 PAX ran down one aisle, turned right, ran up the next, turned left, ran down the next, until the far western section, at which point we ran back to the beginning in the northeast corner—and so on for exactly 30 minutes. On the concourse after each sprint/run/jog/loaf up the stairs, we alternated doing 10 merkins one trip and then a 30-second plank hold the next.

Coco’s GPS measured it at 2.4 miles. The mumblechatter was deafening the first five minutes. Not such much as the numbers of stairs mounted as the workout ensued. Thankfully it was a moderate low-60s temperature—not the early day heat and humidity we’d experienced so much this summer.

We tied it all up with a session of Mary that consisted of LBCs x 20, Heels to Heavens x 20, American Hammers x 20 and an orgy of Flutters—some long and slow and some quite quick indeed, thanks to the young whippersnapper Prancing Horse. YHC was too spent to remember the count, though it neared three digits.

T-Claps for Au Jus for just having run the Spartan in Asheville and to Baby Ruth on his annual trip from Southern Pines to Chapel Hill for a banking conference. Coco keeps thinking he’s saying “baking conference” and is still awaiting some cheesecake.