A :30 delay was announced by our Benevolent Dictator (works well in 3rd world countries so why not at the Battering Ram) due to about a 1/2 inch of snow. I came in about 10 minutes late at 6:10 and was rapidly approached by a frantic Banana Skin who must have been instructed by his dear old Dad to come force me to do his non Rope oriented EC. I however did not commit to any such proceedings and informed him I was headed to the pot and had other things to accomplish before hand. Namely marking the field for our ME mission assignments. I was assisted by Goldenboy who helped me mark the mid width line (the Battering Ram has amazingly intricate lines) and to enlarge the mid circle by 5 shovel lengths. I tackeled the mid length line and hereby forgot to do the start length line (red), end length line (red), start width line (color forgotten) and end width line (maybe there was none to begin with). Needless to say either PAX were too nice to comment during ME or just didn't notice, I'm going to gander a guess at option 2.

I had to go with Plan B 'Longitude has Latitude' as Plan A 'Stepping Inside' would have been precariously dangerous on the stadium steps and outdoor amphitheatr respectively.

I decided it was such a pristine morning of divine proportions with the snow all sparkly shimmering air that I should play some Kora music. Nightshift enjoyed it immensely and wanted to know the artist and album but I'm keeping that a secret in case I need something from him in terms of becoming a Mustelid Shaker of some other species then a wimpy weasel, better yet a wolverine.

I arrived a bit after the bell tower rang 7 however my watch (which is set accurately to my phone connected to wi-fi) said it was 6:59 and 33 seconds. Alas I arrived just in the nick of time ready for Warmarama when hitherto I saw the young up and comer rabble rouser Red Ryder talking to his GrandMother on the phone. This necessitated a severe punishment of 20 burpees!

Warmarama:

SSHx33
WMHx12
Arm Circles Forward (w/optional Cafh stretch) x10
Arm Circles Backwards (w/optional Cafh stretch)x10
Wide Slow Squats x10

Brass Tax (the Thang):

***Longitude***

-starting at the Red line-
*100 squats – led by Uzi who gave us a breather at 50 to which I was vehemently appalled but alas I forgot to tell him the point of 'Longitude has Latitude' (tradmarked and copyrighted) is to push through beyond what's possible and dig deeper then your feet have wheels.
*Bear Crawl to Midfield
*100 Xfactors to which I tried to Count but I kept choking on Coca leaves which is a constant issue I face when chewing too dry of Coca and trying to yell with my head in the wrong position. Towards the end I noticed Maraschino has phenomenally exquisite Xfactor form structure so I asked him to demonstrate. He was kind enough to do so and seemed to lavish at being at the spotlight.
*Crawl Bear to the other end of the field Red Line.
*100 Merkins
I counted to 50 I think but then began to lose momentum so I asked Elwood to take us to 75, I forgot to ask for a 10 count so he took us to 75 quite rapidly. I made the same mistake again and asked the Count of MonteCristo (my Count brother by chance coming to a CoQ theatre near you in 22') to get us to 100. He had no mercy on us and got us to 100 quite briskly.

—Returning Home—

*Crab walk to the midline (which is a thick blue line with 2 yellow lines on either side if your ever wondering, actually Flapjack was kind enough to point this out to me before the ME)
*100 xFactors led by the xFactor Maestro fkaSprinkles
*Walk Crab home to the red line

***Latitude***

Starting at the beginning width line I forgot to mark
*50 cadence count Mountain Climbers, I counted. At about 30 I began to choke on Coca leaves again but Elwood bailed me out and was the only one to stay on track with the count.
*Sideways Bear Crawl to the Width midline that Golden Boy marked out for me.
*20 stupid Livingroom Switcheroos that I invented while watching the weather channel snowed in at my parents house a couple weeks ago. OYO
***These proved to make my ass very icy and uncomfortable
*Sideways Crab walk to the end width line
At this point I observed Nightshift being a bad influence of Flapjack to which perturbed me as I happen to really like Flapjack and would hate to see him hanging out with someone that lays down during COT. So I announced Uzi would enforce 20 Seal Burpees once we reached the other side.
*20 Seal Burpees on Uzi's count. At about 14 only Disc was counting and shortly after that even Uzi seemed to get tripped up on his instructions due to exhaustion to which is something I thought I would never witness. Needless to say those Seal Burpees were amazingly challenging in the best possible way and I was glad I called the impromptu audible.

—Returning Home—

*Bear Crawl sideways to the midpoint
*20 stupid Livingroom Switcheroos OYO
*Crab walk to the start

COT

Shout outs to those that we haven't seen in a while, we shall connect with them in some shape or form. Shout outs to those on the IR, we will keep them in the loop.

Hallelujah for such a majestically pristine morning!