Dang, it is cold out this morning. Kind of like the frigid air of the Nevada desert at night. 8 PAX braved the brutal polar vortex to come out and wish YHC a bon voyage as he ventures off the the mysterious and magical land of Las Vegas, Nevada next week. YHC is no stranger to Vegas. I once lost a huge bet on March Madness and then, shortly after, for no good reason, one of my friends nut punched me. As I was bent over, broke and in visceral agony, another friend clapped me on the should and said “This is what Vegas feels like.” That feeling was the very essence of what I wanted to convey to our frigid PAX this morning.
Warm-up
Side Shuffle Hops x 30
Arm circles forward x 15
Willie Mayes Hayes x 10
Harvester x 10
Stretch out…wait…Cosmo said he needed reverse arm circles so he could stretch his other leg. No problem! Reverse Arm Circles x 15
Mosey to the rock pit and pick up a medium to large size rock and bring to the playground.
The Thang: Vegas, Baby!
YHC had arranged to have multiple casino-like options for today’s downpainment. First, ChooChoo made him replacement dice after a FNG at F3 Chapel Hill Keenan AO viciously broke my last set. Included in the setup was an iPad with Roulette app loaded. Hit spin and get a number between zero and 36. Also, a deck of cards.
Each PAX partners up. Each group rolls the dice and does whatever is on the message board. Each set is three rolls of the dice.
Roll 1: Do ONE THOUSAND BURPEES. (Took the group a few seconds to get this one)
Roll 2: Burpees/Merkins/Pullups/Dips x 10 each
Roll 3: WWII setups x 30
Roll 4: Donkey Kicks x 30
Roll 5: Squat jumps x 30
Roll 6: Play Roulette and do that many merkins (If # is <10, add 10)
Roll 7: Roll both die and do that many pullups
Roll 8: Draw 2 cards from deck and do that many Burpees
Roll 9: Swerkins x 20
Roll 10: Flutter Kicks x 30 (cadence)
Roll 11: Lunge Walk around the playground
Roll 12: Bear crawl around the playground
After each set, we “left the casino” and went “to the club.” A song was played and stuff was done based on the lyrics of that song. Then we ran a lap around the peanut “exploring the Strip.” We then mixed up the groups because everyone makes friends in Vegas. Also this ensured that no two PAX had the same workout experience this morning.
Here we go….
Dice roll and exercise x 3.
Club #1: “I got 5 on it.” YHC reminded the PAX that marijuana was now legalized in the state of Nevada. As such, our good friends in the rap group Luniz, sang of the virtues of the wacky weed. (To be fair and unbiased, they did not address the socioeconomic, health, or legal ramifications of narcotic use). PAX started in a plank position. Each time the word “five” was mentioned, PAX did 5 merkins. In total, 75 merkins were done during the course of this song. Stay off drugs, kids!
Run a Lap, switch partners.
Dice roll and exercise x 3.
Club #2: “Turn down for what.” The PAX did the old football drill here, running in place. Whenever Lil John says “turn down for what!” PAX dropped to the ground and back up again. We never did find out why he was turning stuff down.
Run a Lap, switch partners.
“Club” #3: Vegas has some, how should we say, alternative clubs one might visit. While at that club, the PAX picked up a fine lass named Sally. The PAX were reminded that they had previously picked out a rock. Their rock is now named Sally. We played Moby’s famous song “Flower” and whenever he said “Bring Sally Up,” PAX did an overhead press.
Special side note: Merlot was spilled by an unnamed PAX at this point and this also represents the Vegas experience.
At this point, our night in Vegas was over. Time was up. We were broken, nauseous and felt like our friend just punched us in the nuts! If Vegas had a perfume, that would be the fragrance.
COT
Moleskin:
The Bull is 10/26/19. Tell your wives you are busy. Recruit your friends. Save up some money for the shirt.