Stalwart PAX began with a 3/4 Fellowship Lap to circle up for a traditional warm-up, with the regular rounds of Side-Shuffle Hops, Good Mornings, Willie Mays Hayes, Arm Circles, Imperial Walkers and Hillbillies, then gamely tucked in for the main course of ‘erkins:

5 Celebration Merkins OYO (celebrating both the merkin itself and Kia arriving mid-warmup). Each is just a single merkin after which we hop to our feet and throw our hands up in the air in celebration. Spirits were still high at this point.

Merkin Medley – a delightful stream-of-consciousness mix of merkins, wide-grip merkins, various plank holds, sometimes mountain climbers, and occasional Nolan Ryans, of utterly indeterminate duration

PAX then headed to toward the track, though progress was interrupted by a spontaneous bout of Clock Merkins on the grassy hill. PAX became hour hands in plank position, with 12:00 uphill and 6:00 downhill. Pivoting clockwise (always) with feet stationary, they moved to various hour positions and pumped out the number of merkins in the minutes position. PAX called out times which included 12:03, 3:07, 9-something, 6:11, and definitely a “one-oh-zero”.

Finally reaching the track, we completed a Merkin Mile, with four quarter-mile laps each topped with a solid 15-ct of merkins. Celebration Merkins were recommended as a holding pattern for the faster runners, but all our faster runners were out for triathlons this week. We kept it pretty tight. The mile was topped off with an Irkin / Dirkin Pyrimid at the bleachers, to ten by twos. Natural erosion interfered with the downslope, and PAX missed “eight” with few complaints (some general grumbling).

Returning to the field via an impromptu Wilderness Trail Run, PAX executed somewhere around 6-8 Eight-Count Celebration Man Merkins, though it was hard to count with all the celebration. Spirits somehow still high.

Pairing up, PAX prepared for two rounds of partner exercises:

1) Stationary person does 60:40 Squats:Hopping Shirukens while partner travels to 18 and back with Bear Crawl Merkins. Switch, repeat.

2) Stationary person grabs ankles and starts Twerkin’ while partner Runs to mid-field and back. Runners encouraged to be Really Workin’. Switch, repeat for two full rounds.

Mary proceeded with a second Merkin Medley, a round of Flutter Kirken (little-known variation common to German clergy; body in a cross-shape with arms extended, legs a’kirken), a solid round of Captain Therkins (1:4 WWIIs:Hammers, with 3 merkins; escalating up to 5:20), and about eightish Foxhole Merkins.