INTRODUCTION: Next week will be my 3rd year F3 anniversary as it turns out. Like all the Pax who keep coming out for these early-morning shenanigans, this serves a need that oftentimes we didn’t recognize until after we were committed. I’ve had to curtail my F3 commitment due to increasing out-of-office work commitments, and frankly, friggin’ injury, but my heart is true. I’ve met incredible people through F3: men of discipline, conviction, and morality. I have seen men develop impressive leadership skills. I can also walk anywhere in this neighborhood and see a friendly face, which is pretty satisfying. As I mentioned above, injuries have derailed my fitness train repeatedly – increased stretching I hope will be the long-term solution as I close in on “Respect!” status this summer. 2019 was marred by a herniated disc, and though I’m mostly better, I’ve sworn off activities that are likely to be a bad idea until I’m positive I’m completely healed. So my loss is your gain, as this workout will be 100% Burpee- and Bear Crawl-free (but hopefully will not disappoint). We will start up high and progressively move down the body, shredding body parts as we go. Let’s do it.
WARM UP: All the usual suspects (performed at a socially safe distance due to COVID-19). SSH IC x 30, FAC IC x 10, RAC IC x 10, WMH IC x 10 (lead by Dive), slow merkins IC x 10, Free Style (do what you need) x 60 seconds
THE THANG: Fellowship jog down “Main Street” of the AO until reaching the Stop Sign, then return and progressively pick up speed until hitting your run speed as you return to the Startex. Now let’s go Head to Toe.
Head: I’ve got nothing for the head and neck. Point mucous membranes away from people for a few months.
Shoulders: Overhead claps IC x 30. Now partner up and alternate resisting your partner’s shoulder abduction, IC x 10, 3 sets. Dry docks IC x 10. That’s PLENTY!
Biceps/Back: You knew it was coming. Proceed to pull-up bars and alternate spotting and pulling to 10 reps x 3 sets.
Hand/grip: Traverse pull-up bars from one corner to the opposite corner (i.e., 2 sides). This was difficult after the pull-ups!
Chest: Merkin ring of fire meets Usain Bolt. Assume large ring formation, and 1-by-1 each PAX peels off and sprints around the group, calling out a Merkin type to be single-counted by the next in line. This was hard.
Triceps: Mosey to picnic tables. Dips IC x 20.
Core/abs: Plank–o-rama: start with alternating arm-leg extensions, slowly in cadence x 10, then Parker Peters IC x 10, slowly with attention to form. Side plank with slow Nolan Ryans IC x 10 on each side. I decided to table the Makhtar N’Diaye’s for another workout based on the overall vibe of the Pax.
Butt/Quads: Dueling Banjos led us in 10 slow Homer-to-Marge’s IC x 10. Now everyone get in bridge and do alternating hip flexion (like marching in bridge position), slowly IC x 20. Then stand for a squat ring of fire, SC x 10 each, while the remainder of the PAX do squat pulses.
Calves/Hammies: Big Boy Skip down the hill past the tennis courts to the Stop sign and wait for the Pax. That seemed silly, but it was tiring, and also, all of this silly. Then after a breather, Bernie Sanders back to the AO.
MARY: we already did that above. However, I treated myself and the Pax to a Corpse Pose in honor of Rambler and that felt nice.
COT: Announcements: Gambler on 5/16, Run for Malawi upcoming in early May- check Slack for details on a BC faction.
LOOSELY-AGGREGATED BOM: With COVID-19 causing a panic throughout the country and world, get reliable information so that you can be a beacon of information, trust and sensibility to your family, co-workers, and community. Be safe and be smart. Aye!